today after sch.. saw 4 gers at our sch bus stop.. haiz.. wad should i say?? then went home.. c the time.. still can make it for soccer.. so went.. halfway thru my journey.. it poured.. then went to packet food.. then went find them.. then put my food there.. bird eat.. diao.. haha.. then played soccer.. shoe wet.. socks wet.. cos raining.. then cs came.. just upstairs wif trix doing their things.. then cs left to meet.. then after sometime.. me, thia, darren and sandy left for home.. like tt lor.. long time nv play soccer.. haha.. jiu jiu yi ci..

haiz.. missing her.. loving her.. wanting her.. needing her..


veggied on 10:04:00 PM

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Monday, April 26, 2004

yest so happy.. went watch cyndi wif her.. haha.. 230 reach liao.. got PS walk walk.. wAlk the whole PS.. then cyndi haven come.. then waited for her to arrive.. stand by the side.. then cyndi bus arrive.. taped it down.. then she sing.. dance.. greet us.. then started the autograph session.. long queue.. then me and her went walk walk.. i bring her ard.. hee.. then wait til not many pple.. then we go get her autograph.. haha.. she so ke ai.. said.. "hi".. then i ask her jiayou.. hee.. she is very ke ai.. then after tt.. ate dinner.. then go home.. enjoyed myself wif her.. so happy.. could not sleep.. haha.. AI NI!! then reach home. chat chat chat.. haha..

veggied on 10:15:00 PM

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Friday, April 23, 2004

mm.. today went sch.. early dismiss.. then came home.. father fetch to hougang to sports meet.. then got march past.. then raining.. early dismiss.. then went home.. sianz.. nth interesting..

at nite.. went to one of the pub in clarke quay to watch SH!N.. nice.. but boring at first when the DJs frm UFM play lame games.. then shin came out.. sang.. so HIGH.. and encored one song.. the system sucks.. having prib wif michael's drum and xiao hua's guitar.. but it was nice.. after tt.. went to the bar for a drink of coke.. cos got coupon.. to redeem.. then after tt.. the gers beside me gave me 3 more coupons..cos they leaving.. used one by my god sis.. then we sat there and drink.. then some female smokers came.. then leaving tt time.. wantted to give them the coupons.. but they say they also leaving soon.. so wasted the coupon lor.. looking forward to 18yrs old.. to pub.. haha..

veggied on 10:44:00 PM

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Tuesday, April 20, 2004

today.. went yw house there .. but she left cos i late.. then PE.. played soccer.. then went to find mr lim.. he talked to me.. abt some stuffs.. then after sch.. went j8 eat.. then go for 2.4... failed.. haiz.. dor was there.. stitch .. very very pain.. walk very slow.. then after a while.. jog.. still pain.. then failed lor.. maybe this is an excuse ba.. but dunno la.. very pain.. eat luo mi fan.. then very full.. haiz.. retest lor.. after tt.. heard tt cheryl coming.. then i call ask whether yw coming.. then YEA! she came.. gave her lollipop.. then treat her ice stick.. then she smile.. like to c her so happy.. hee.. then sent her to her house bus stop.. then she accomapany me wait bus.. then bus came.. she left.. we got a great chat.. =).. dun misunderstood.. me and her only frens.. k?

haiz..
haiz..
haiz..
haiz..

veggied on 8:38:00 PM

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Sunday, April 18, 2004

haiz.. me.. me.. me.. me.. i am the one.. who did tt.. i said to her.. then cause such things.. new couples formed.. another one broke.. this kind of things.. i experienced it myself.. and saw it happen myself too.. haiz.. is there a limit to a no. of couples?? i am so irriatating.. i am an irritant.. grr!! all bushuang me.. settle la.. verbally.. not violence.. argh!!

when i am bored.. i wan to find someone to tok to.. but i just seems to be irritating pple.. and make them more bu shuang me.. haiz.. wth.. its all in a mess.. my world.. i dunno how to face it.. who will ask abt me.. concern abt me.. execept (",).. i need her.. but who is she.. she does not reply my mail now..

how i wish.. i met with an accident.. and stay in hospital in a COMA state.. not dead.. then i can really take a rest.. and noe who r the one who care in my life.. i am very tired.. just need a break.. isolation?

if others say some things.. then cos a couple to break.. how strong is the relationship.. how true is it..

veggied on 4:12:00 PM

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Saturday, April 17, 2004

yO yO.. cheryl and cs stead le wor.. today at 12am plus a bit i think.. but i sleep le.. haha.. and morning wake up receive msg frm cheryl.. "u sleep le?.. i agree wad crap.. u shuold understand..".. smth like tt.. haha.. congrats to them.. then today went out liao.. but wif us.. after tt dunno la.. and then.. nv hold hand for us to c.. haiyo.. ke xi.. then i left liao.. mm... missing (",).. waitiing for her call.. but she nv call.. or maybe she did.. but i nv ans.. cos got two miss call when i played pool today..

sianz.. dun feel like studying.. juz wanna rest.. wanna take a long break.. very tired.. nth goes in my mind.. no motivation in life.. .. .. .. .. .. .. where is the love? haha..

veggied on 4:13:00 PM

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Friday, April 16, 2004

these few days.. not only hot.. more pple are getting hurt.. seeing their OD, their nick.. everybody seems to be troubling over things.. relationships.. frens.. studies.. and i certainly noe.. and certainly feel tt a lot of pple are still bu shuang me.. cos maybe i scld?? but i am VERY sure tt i am not now.. go out tt time.. talk only countable sentence.. less than i tok to dor.. mm.. i shall announced.. i get over it completely.. but will still kpo about their progress.. haha.. like wad cs always ask me when i stead.. got meet?.. haha.. now is my turn.. to ask .. hee.. shall not follow if there is no companion.. haha.. mm..

frens.. can u be frank to me.. wad r u unhappy abt me now.. i really dunno.. maybe i am tt stupid.. that i could not figure it out myself.. either email me.. or chat online.. or call me or wad.. tell me.. and settle peacefully.. and to throw out wad u not happy abt me.. can?? no need tag and say.. cos it wun be so short de.. haha.. where is my frens?? haha.. still pulling them back.. so tt we can still talk.. go out happily or wad.. not neglecting me..

veggied on 7:50:00 PM

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Thursday, April 15, 2004

nowadays.. the weather is getting very very hot.. esp in sch.. juz walking to sch.. sweat like shit.. walk out.. take bus.. also de same.. in class.. no direct fan.. worse.. have to bring towel everyday.. then thia started bringing ice water.. and i followed.. last time rain pple grumble.. now got sun.. also grumble.. mm.. windy and not sunny will do.. hee.. thia's hair is getting longer sia.. haha.. and prelims are coming.. after encouragement.. mostly frm darren.. and cl tt day.. getting really better.. and noe more things.. like a lot of pple bushuang me.. like justin.. and others.. mm.. cos of scld?? haha.. can say.. so called.. gave up?? or wad.. haha.. actually.. also did not put in hope.. and have totally no intention of being stead again liao.. juz tt.. cannot xi guan dun call or wad.. haah.. i am an irritant(irriatating person).. haha.. but now.. improvement.. call less.. and is very less.. like wen hou or wad.. nv chat.. ltr cs jealous and dulan me.. haha.. zap.. i wan go out study.. and is really de study one.. !!! alone.. or wad.. haha.. crap.. now is cs turn.. "after sch got ROU?".. haha.. then a big gang follow.. billis juz exploded.. by a bit... 13dollar plus.. i think my frens worse than me.. haha.. who to blame?? myself la.. sianz.. when can this stressful life stops?? haiz.. move on.. and on.. and on.. and on.. .... ... ... ...

veggied on 6:21:00 PM

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Tuesday, April 13, 2004

after seeing cheelim OD.. realise i also got a lot of SOMETIMEs.. hahaa.. sometime this.. sometime tt.. duno la..

veggied on 9:08:00 PM

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Monday, April 12, 2004

woohoo.. cs and cheryl are progressing well.. all the best for them.. and to all other couples.. chang chang jiu jiu.. then prelims are coming.. so dun neglect ur studies etc.. time management is impt.. erm.. i think tt's all.. and jiayou for cedar c division vballers.. =)

veggied on 9:23:00 PM

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Saturday, April 10, 2004

"i've tried to let go..."

all i get from my frens.. are juz harsh words.. comments.. which are meant to suan me.. mock me.. or laugh at me.. wth man.. i've been backstabbed.. my frens.. and badmouthed by others.. who to trust.. who to confide in.. who to tok to.. all hates me man.. dislike me.. argh!!! still wanna live on this world...

veggied on 6:19:00 PM

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Friday, April 09, 2004

haiz.. "love is not having someone u can live with.. but having somone u can't live without".. "love is to see her having her own happiness after leaving u".. so many quotes of love.. are so ambigious.. i think i wun say anything about my feelings for her ba.. the difference.. cos.. there is no need to let everyone noe.. but one thing i am sure is tt is not the strong love last time.. but for others.. i hope i could say.. like mich.. i dunno whether he got treat me as a brother.. but i certainly treat her as a very dear sister to me.. cos she is the only sis to me.. hee.. now.. she got a bf le.. and i am glad for her.. as long as she is happy in wad she do.. tt will do le ba.. hope her bf wun play her or wad.. on the other hand.. quite worry bout her maths.. mm.. tt should be all ba.. then for yw.. is only frens ba.. juz tt she everytime make me worry abt her.. when go out.. she walk so slow.. then i will pei her lor.. or else she get lost.. or even she get lost.. i accompany her lost.. then very guan xing ta ba.. mm.. trix.. dunno wad to say.. ltr justin mao me.. haha.. also not really very close to her .. haha. but she got the potentail.. but dunno wad is inside her tt pulled her back last yr.. she can top her class in maths this yr.. why not last yr.. is not whether u can.. is whether u wan.. then bout my classmates.. a lot to say.. but sometime.. i noe they quite bushuang me.. like the orders cock up.. or wad.. like today.. go out tt time.. i dunno.. maybe i too sensitive le ba.. or wad.. but they are still pple which i dun mind hanging ard with.. like wc.. the crazy mode which i like.. haha.. and cs.. so funny.. or i can say.. joker.. sooo cuutte.. but sometime.. over act-cute.. haha.. mmm.. in life.. we have to live it in satisfactory.. or else.. it will be a sour one.. haiz.. i think .. many pple are saying my circle of life is very limited.. is like all wif her.. or wad.. maybe ba.. but i still chose to live tt way.. does not wish to noe more diff girls.. or wad.. cos beside her.. is already lots of girls.. eg. MICHELLE.. hahaha.. jk.. all of a sudden.. i like TAO ZE's song.. i dunno why.. til now.. i understand wad his song mean.. and sometime.. it really fits into my life.. songs like.. ÆÕͨÅóÓÑ, ÌìÌì, °®£¬ºÜ¼òµ¥, ¼ÅįµÄ¼¾½Ú.. and some other songs frm other atrise.. the lyrics is so meaningfull.. sometime.. thru this songs.. i find the correct way of looking at things.. like love.. friendship.. etc.. dunno whether the chinese words can be seen anot.. haiz..


MISSING YOU
ÎÒÀ뿪»ú³¡×êÈëËíµÀÖÐ µ²·ç²£Á§ÉϵÄÓê
ÏñÒ»¸öÃÎ ÎÒ°®ÉÏÁËÒ»¸öÈË¿ÉÊÇûÓÐÓÃ
ÕâÎÞÈ˵ÄÒ¹Íí Óиö¹Âµ¥µÄÓ¢ÐÛ
Õâ¼Åį¹ã³¡ÎÒÒ»¸öÈËÑݳö ÎÒÓÃ×îºóÕâһĻ˵ÎÒ°®Äã
ÕâЩ»ØÒäÊÇÎÒµÄË­Ò²²»×¼Åö TOMORROWÎÒ²»¹Ü
¾ÍËãÎÒµÄÐĺÜÍ´ Çë¸øÎÒÈ«ÊÀ½çµÄ¼Åį
Everyday everynight I am Missing you
ÎÒÓÀÔ¶»á¼Çס ÄÄÅÂʲô¶¼Ã»ÓÐ
±ðÍüÁË̫ƽÑóÁíÒ»±ßÓиöÎÒ ÎÒÌýÕâÒ»³¡Óê½µÂäµÄËÙ¶È
ÄãµÄ³¤·¢ºÍζÈÎÒûÍü¼Ç ÕâÒ»·ÖÖÓÎÒ´©¹ýÀä±ùµÄ¹«Â·
ÔÚ¼¸Ç§¹«ÀïÍâ ÎҵļÇÒäÔÚÌÓ×ß
Çë¸øÎÒÈ«ÊÀ½çµÄ¼Åį Everyday Everynight
I am Missing you ÎÒÓÀÔ¶»á¼Çס
ÄÄÅÂʲô¶¼Ã»ÓÐ ±ðÍüÁË̫ƽÑóÁíÒ»±ßÓиöÎÒ
ÎÒµÄ˼ÄîÔÚ´óº° Ã»ÓÐʱ¼äÔÚµóÄÑ
ÎÒҪȥÄÇÒ»¸öÏëÄîÄãµÄʱ¿Õ Çë¸øÎÒÈ«ÊÀ½çµÄ¼Åį
Everyday Everynight I am Missing you
ÎÒÓÀÔ¶»á¼Çס ÄÄÅÂʲô¶¼Ã»ÓÐ
±ðÍüÁË̫ƽÑóÁíÒ»±ßÓиöÎÒ Çë¸øÎÒÈ«ÊÀ½çµÄ¼Åį
Everyday Everynight I am Missing you
ÎÒÓÀÔ¶»á¼Çס ÄÄÅÂʲô¶¼Ã»ÓÐ
±ðÍüÁË̫ƽÑóÁíÒ»±ßÓиöÎÒ ±ðÍüÁË̫ƽÑóÁíÒ»±ßÓиöÎÒ

veggied on 7:37:00 PM

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Thursday, April 08, 2004

.. today ms foo return me my ngage.. say dun use in sch time again..

wad is love? a very complicating word again.. yuwen.. always make me worry about her.. so tired.. nx time then type la..

veggied on 9:32:00 PM

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Wednesday, April 07, 2004

today.. took back geog paper.. passed and awarded sweets.. then ms foo saw me using hp den confiscate my hp.. fine lor.. nth to say.. but thanks to justin.. and shanjun.. help me take out sim card.. then realise dog and cs also helped in distracting ms foo.. thanks frens.. then have pft.. etc.. then reach home.. father say.. how can use hp in sch.. haha.. also really nth.. then saw ms foo.. asked her.. she say she haven give ms koh the hp..

haiz.. so frustrated.. so confuse.. so messy.. wad is a good fren? u treat as gd fren.. but not in return.. counted? somethings.. inside.. or i can say secret.. which will influence pple.. had make me wonder whether i should say..
wadeva la.. nth much.. juz feeling very frustrated

remember last yr.. when i first got my sweet.. i gave it to MICHELLE lim li wen.. cos i noe she like swt.. but now..

veggied on 8:01:00 PM

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Tuesday, April 06, 2004

today.. cut my hair.. a bit the poser type of fin head.. which is not obivious... did not really like this hair...

i certainly noe tt i cannot change wad happen in de past.. it is only left as memories.. or lessons in life.. and i also noe that i think too much.. esp when i am alone.. at home or bus.. then will just think and think.. hoping to find an answer.. i did not think of lonely pple.. but i tot of animals.. watching the progress how they are killed.. the whole process b4 it was in the market.. it hurts me.. and i really can't bear to eat those.. imagine how they are killed when u r eating.. can u still eat wif satisfactory... animals are just lower class than us.. but.. they.. also have feelings.. if a tiger charge u.. will u escape? of cos u will.. cos u are scared to die and eaten by them.. chickens.. pigs etc.. before they are killed.. do u think they die willingly.. they dun.. they even cried.. "so many meat on the market.. dun eat is a waste".. this is just an excuse.. if u dun demand it.. who will kill.. it is becos of the demand by pple.. then this animal will be killed..

in that long race.. i ran along.. but i hope by my side.. is another runner.. where we can both support each other.. encouraging each other.. and helping each other when we trip.. and holding hand to the finishing point.. i dun think there is time to take a break.. i have to cross something hard... challenging.. before taking a short break.. but as days pass.. i feel very stress.. not having enuff time to prepare.. but i noe i can do it.. bcos i can.. haha..

veggied on 6:04:00 PM

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Sunday, April 04, 2004

after so many days of breakup.. i finally learn many many new things.. skills in life.. and my que dian.. but learning mistake but take no actions to improve on it is useless.. but i have totally no idea whether i can change myself anot.. haiz.. at first.. it started wif a simple friendship.. and progress to a closer one.. with totally no intention of being stead.. til the day.. when i am afraid i will lose her.. to other guys.. i won her heart.. now.. losing her heart.. makes me learn new thing.. may be.. i should really give her happiness.. w/o me or with me.. which is the greatest sacrifice.. not trying to make myself noble.. but.. it is really very hard.. to let her have her own happiness.. but ownself living quite miserably.. in the day at sch.. other than lessons.. is the laughter and life of my frens.. at home.. it is totally silence.. maybe with the television sound.. or music.. at night.. looking out if the window.. is darkness.. and where can i find light in this darkness.. tt will really shine on me.. staring at the hps in front.. the only change is time.. in this life.. preparing for the prelim one.. that is abt one month from now.. but where do i start.. where is the self discpline inside me.. i can't find it.. me myself.. experencing a fall in love.. and witness a rise in love.. things may not suit wad we want.. but.. we can chose to live it.. or avoid it.. but it still exists.. i once have a childish thinking.. abt stead.. which is talking so long on the phone.. going out.. dating.. and nth else.. now.. i have a total different one.. stead is just like a very very close and good fren.. only diff is hug and kisses.. plus holding hands.. slowly.. in the world.. many pple are suffering frm love.. many are enjoying.. and many dunno wad is love.. what will u choose in the path in ur life..

prelim is coming.. all the best for everyone.. and bless all to be well.. healthy.. and cheerful

veggied on 7:47:00 PM

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Friday, April 02, 2004

yO.. i think i getting better le.. thanks for ur comments.. some.. emailed me.. and (",) .. ur words rocks.. erm.. may i noe who u r?? can email me ur identity or wad ba..

today.. got back english mock test.. failed badly.. haiz.. as usual.. cos of summary.. die.. then after tt.. no assembly for us.. goh teck koon came to our class to brief on o level stuffs.. make me so pressure.. suddenly.. i felt so stress.. then she also gave many advices.. which i wrote down.. "hope for the best, prepare for the worst".. and skills to master physics.. "study.. think.. understand.. memorise..practice.. "... then after sch.. went j8 find those pple.. but found no them.. then me cs.. and just.. went eating.. small little things.. then go just house play soccer.. raining.. shoe all wet.. ahha.. long time nv play le.. then got two guests.. kok teng and cheelim.. mmm.. then let in lots of goals.. and missed one chance.. but grab the other and score the ball tt yenhao crossed.. but only one goal.. compare to others.. they scored so much..haha.. i only fries..

veggied on 7:03:00 PM

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Thursday, April 01, 2004

haix.. bcos of cheelim.. ask cheryl to ask me fuck off.. things happened.. i dunno..!! why muz he interfere my things.. i already get over it le lor.. sms her.. also cannot? break le cannot communicate?? UR LOGIC.. not mine.. i sleep in class.. can relate til her.. take a phone on my hand.. say i waiting for her sms.. i did not say anything now and u keep relate to her.. want me to live on in life.. aren't i doing tt.. haix.. i can feel that u r concern.. but.. i hope u can simply tok to me.. not involving others.. i noe.. u got ask me dun SCLD.. i dunno y u bushuang.. and tell u.. and everyone.. not everything in life suits u.. accomadate.. i am doing fine now.. having tight sleep.. not crying anymore or wad.. haix.. i dun think i have the freedom.. or losing freedom.. maybe u all are concern ba.. i dunno.. i dun like u all say SCLD.. cos.. now.. i am NOT.. cheelim.. hope our guan xi wun sour la.. really.. then.. sometime.. i think u interfere too much le ba.. hope i can get some peace.. i noe u all wan be get over or wad.. now.. i wan be fren wif her.. u all also chap.. so.. is there a need to ask if i can fren wif anyone...

anyway.. have any long comments de hua.. email me...

veggied on 6:39:00 PM

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